SUCH a similar path, listening to the "scale, leverage, six figures!" choir. I wrote a whole section about it in my memoir ("The Power of the Curve" - which has multiple meanings). About the multi-year period where I tried to be someone I wasn't, listened to the choir, and almost destroyed myself, my business, finances, and marriage in the process. It felt gross the entire time but I kept doing it because I didn't have the self confidence to stop.
At that time in my life I was also immersed in networking groups (events, conferences, etc.) & a network of fellow entrepreneurs where the "scale, six figures, funnels, courses, programs..." noise was overwhelming. That plus not really knowing who I wanted to be or where I wanted to go... I drowned.
This part almost hurts: "I didn't have the self confidence to stop". People don't understand how brave you need to be to step out of the machine that has been designed to keep you controlled.
It's a scary thing to step out of the familiar into the unknown. I think it was Karl Marx that said, "Religion is the opiate of the masses." He was 99% incorrect. Familiarity and certainty is the opiate of the masses. Religion is just a small piece of that pie.
Maybe religion channels the familiarity & certainty into a structure thus reinforcing the walls of familiarity and certainty over time, making them more and more impermeable to outside influences... like uncertainty.
I'm a bit more of an oddball myself, and I grew up not too far from you in SC, and I have my own stories to share about my experience growing up as an Asian American in the Deep South.
I may not understand or get everything you write, but I read it all the same. It's interesting to see what defines others when they're real. That's what I'm writing about...identity rooted in internals as opposed to what society expects and extracts from.
I have long ago realized that "niche" is just a fancy way to divide us and keep us uninteresting. The more we focus on a single area, the more we alienate ourselves from the fact that humans are complicated, intricate beings who will find millions of subjects interesting.
Great post! No one wants to feel overtly selfish, but the motivation to create has to start with what you want, not what other people want. If expectation comes into play, it has to be what you expect of yourself, not what others expect out of you. If obligation comes into the picture, it has to be what you owe yourself, not what you owe others.
The successful creator is the one who does these things in such a way that others notice and accept, on the terms of the things, not theirs.
Pat Metheny, the famed jazz guitarist, once said that he played what he wanted to hear. David Bowie said something in a similar vein - that once you begin playing to the gallery, you stop doing your best work. Both got the audiences they wanted.
Yep, totally agree with all that. The reason I kept failing, giving up, and changing projects was because I wasn't doing what I wanted to do. I was doing what others said I should do. Now, I'm on a path to make more money off my creativity than I ever did the other way.
Very relatable, very much on point concerning the creator growth guru machine. It was for this specific reason I initially literally wrote to no one. I started a project, created the brand (it’s my background, can’t help it), and kept all my content on a website I built for it for months. Then once I felt that the voice and direction was my own I began to engage on social media and instantly hated every second of it. While doing so I noticed the space I was publishing and sharing into had this plastic and artificial cookie cutter vibe to everything. Then I came here, liked what I saw, got an account started and for the first few weeks was assaulted by gurus telling me how I should grow anything. At this point I came to a conclusion: this is just another filter and I don’t need to participate in it, I didn’t for months and felt fine about it. Veils and illusions are everywhere man, even in materialistic creator paradise.
Honestly, I wish I would have had the foresight to take your approach. Now I kind of look at it as a whole you live, you learn experience. I have to say, I did make some pretty good friends during that time period that are genuine about what they do. But for the most part, it's exactly how you said: cookie cutter copy machine city.
You're not missing much with the military stuff and the drugs. But bonus points because you've been the pregnant wife! And thank you for the praise. That made me feel good.
I am that weird kid who loved the color and punch of pulp novels and the strange places science fiction could go, and found and still find sporting events torture to sit through.
I also relished making weird connections, and we live in a world that offers endless opportunities to connect things
SUCH a similar path, listening to the "scale, leverage, six figures!" choir. I wrote a whole section about it in my memoir ("The Power of the Curve" - which has multiple meanings). About the multi-year period where I tried to be someone I wasn't, listened to the choir, and almost destroyed myself, my business, finances, and marriage in the process. It felt gross the entire time but I kept doing it because I didn't have the self confidence to stop.
Following the crowd is an alluring thing. Until it turns out it isn't. I think it's very much one of those "the grass is greener" situations.
At that time in my life I was also immersed in networking groups (events, conferences, etc.) & a network of fellow entrepreneurs where the "scale, six figures, funnels, courses, programs..." noise was overwhelming. That plus not really knowing who I wanted to be or where I wanted to go... I drowned.
I've been there. After I got out of the military, felt like my identity had been stripped from me. Trying to transition, I was all over the place.
This part almost hurts: "I didn't have the self confidence to stop". People don't understand how brave you need to be to step out of the machine that has been designed to keep you controlled.
It's a scary thing to step out of the familiar into the unknown. I think it was Karl Marx that said, "Religion is the opiate of the masses." He was 99% incorrect. Familiarity and certainty is the opiate of the masses. Religion is just a small piece of that pie.
Maybe religion channels the familiarity & certainty into a structure thus reinforcing the walls of familiarity and certainty over time, making them more and more impermeable to outside influences... like uncertainty.
Most social and cultural structures seem to be made to direct our behaviors in a certain way. I don't think religion is much different.
Fully agree with you there. Ignorance is the scariest thing in today's society.
Heck of a story, man.
I'm a bit more of an oddball myself, and I grew up not too far from you in SC, and I have my own stories to share about my experience growing up as an Asian American in the Deep South.
I may not understand or get everything you write, but I read it all the same. It's interesting to see what defines others when they're real. That's what I'm writing about...identity rooted in internals as opposed to what society expects and extracts from.
I can only imagine growing up Asian American in the South. I bet you have some stories.
And that's an awesome focus for your writing. I always find people much more interesting when they're what everyone else calls weird or eccentric.
I have long ago realized that "niche" is just a fancy way to divide us and keep us uninteresting. The more we focus on a single area, the more we alienate ourselves from the fact that humans are complicated, intricate beings who will find millions of subjects interesting.
Agreed. That's pretty much the same realization I came to as well.
Great post! No one wants to feel overtly selfish, but the motivation to create has to start with what you want, not what other people want. If expectation comes into play, it has to be what you expect of yourself, not what others expect out of you. If obligation comes into the picture, it has to be what you owe yourself, not what you owe others.
The successful creator is the one who does these things in such a way that others notice and accept, on the terms of the things, not theirs.
Pat Metheny, the famed jazz guitarist, once said that he played what he wanted to hear. David Bowie said something in a similar vein - that once you begin playing to the gallery, you stop doing your best work. Both got the audiences they wanted.
Yep, totally agree with all that. The reason I kept failing, giving up, and changing projects was because I wasn't doing what I wanted to do. I was doing what others said I should do. Now, I'm on a path to make more money off my creativity than I ever did the other way.
Very relatable, very much on point concerning the creator growth guru machine. It was for this specific reason I initially literally wrote to no one. I started a project, created the brand (it’s my background, can’t help it), and kept all my content on a website I built for it for months. Then once I felt that the voice and direction was my own I began to engage on social media and instantly hated every second of it. While doing so I noticed the space I was publishing and sharing into had this plastic and artificial cookie cutter vibe to everything. Then I came here, liked what I saw, got an account started and for the first few weeks was assaulted by gurus telling me how I should grow anything. At this point I came to a conclusion: this is just another filter and I don’t need to participate in it, I didn’t for months and felt fine about it. Veils and illusions are everywhere man, even in materialistic creator paradise.
Honestly, I wish I would have had the foresight to take your approach. Now I kind of look at it as a whole you live, you learn experience. I have to say, I did make some pretty good friends during that time period that are genuine about what they do. But for the most part, it's exactly how you said: cookie cutter copy machine city.
I relate to every bit of this.
(Well, except the military, drugs, and having a pregnant wife parts...)
I read every word. The weird side of you is captivating.
You're not missing much with the military stuff and the drugs. But bonus points because you've been the pregnant wife! And thank you for the praise. That made me feel good.
I feel this post.
I am that weird kid who loved the color and punch of pulp novels and the strange places science fiction could go, and found and still find sporting events torture to sit through.
I also relished making weird connections, and we live in a world that offers endless opportunities to connect things
I'm glad I found you here.
I grew up on a steady diet of comics, pulp fiction, and always had an affinity for the weird and mysterious. I'm right there with you, my friend.
Great to know you 🤝
Same to you, my friend.
Great stuff. I always stop - the moment I feel I might be changing my writing to appeal.
Im in your niche on one . Winning :)